**Official** England in New Zealand

[chalky]

What's that old saying you can't win a test in the 1st session but you can lose it - well England are definately losing it now.

 

[Natman20]

Well, well. Unexpected but excellent start for New Zealand.

 

[Smudge]

This is just a big steaming pile of donkey jizz.

I won't even ask how you're placed to make that comparison.

Martin joins in the fun, grabbing Cook.

 

[Richard]

Stupid bloody game.

This is really starting to piss me off.

There are so many things wrong with that Strauss shot. Go back to Middlesex and learn how to bat again.

This is just a big steaming pile of donkey jizz.

This "holiday" lark not treating you well?

 

[Richard]

What's that old saying you can't win a test in the 1st session but you can lose it - well England are definately losing it now.

Ind33d. Oh well, at least we took it to a decider.

Shocking shot from Cook. I expect it from Strauss these days, but that was abysmal by Cook's standards.

 

[Woodster]

Don't think anyone could have predicted this!! However, I do now predict a rather big partnership between KP and Belly. Or is this wishful thinking!

 

[andruid]

GO Southee, Go Southee, Go Southee !!!

 

[Neil Pickup]

Seeing as the way that England are rewarding my first day off for five weeks is to produce the worst first half-hour of a Test match I have ever had the misfortune to witness, no. Considering either (a) bed or (b) reading about the dark ages as a far more enjoyable alternative right now.

 

[Shaggy Alfresco]

What's that old saying you can't win a test in the 1st session but you can lose it - well England are definately losing it now.

That makes absolutley no sense. If someone loses the test in a session, surely the opposing team wins it?

 

[Zinzan]

May be 7-3, but NZ have to continue to make this new ball count. I wouldn't put it past Pietersen and Bell putting on a 150-200 on this pitch if they get through this new ball.

 

[Richard]

Seeing as the way that England are rewarding my first day off for five weeks is to produce the worst first half-hour of a Test match I have ever had the misfortune to witness, no. Considering either (a) bed or (b) reading about the dark ages as a far more enjoyable alternative right now.

Even this isn't quite as bad as The Wanderers 1999\2000, though at least people were saying England weren't even good enough to be touring (despite the presence of Atherton, Hussain, Stewart, Caddick, Gough and a Vaughan on his 1st tour) in that game, so it wasn't quite as bad as this.

 

[chalky]

Seeing as the way that England are rewarding my first day off for five weeks is to produce the worst first half-hour of a Test match I have ever had the misfortune to witness, no. Considering either (a) bed or (b) reading about the dark ages as a far more enjoyable alternative right now.

I think having major dental surgery would be more enjoyable TBH?

 

[Magrat Garlick]

May be 7-3, but NZ have to continue to make this new ball count. I wouldn't put it past Pietersen and Bell putting on a 150-200 on this pitch if they get through this new ball.

Need at least 300 for that wicket alone to make a game of this though.

 

[Neil Pickup]

Even this isn't quite as bad as The Wanderers 1999\2000, though at least people were saying England weren't even good enough to be touring (despite the presence of Atherton, Hussain, Stewart, Caddick, Gough and a Vaughan on his 1st tour) in that game, so it wasn't quite as bad as this.

The key word being witness.

 

[Richard]

That makes absolutley no sense. If someone loses the test in a session, surely the opposing team wins it?

Nope, the other team can then lose it again.

BTW, Southee's front-foot position looks really good, if he always bowls like that he's not going to be having any no-ball problems.

 

[Natman20]

Seeing as the way that England are rewarding my first day off for five weeks is to produce the worst first half-hour of a Test match I have ever had the misfortune to witness, no. Considering either (a) bed or (b) reading about the dark ages as a far more enjoyable alternative right now.

just try to distract yourself. You will always get the nagging thought "ahh whats happening in the cricket now" and will have to switch it on again. I try often but just can't get away. Bed doesn't work either. You wake up randomly thinking "ahh whats happening in the cricket now."

 

[Richard]

The key word being witness.

You didn't see Jo'burg 99\00? Can only presume the 14-year-old Dickinson knew better how to spend his time than the 14-year-old Pickup then TBH.

 

[Neil Pickup]

You didn't see Jo'burg 99\00? Can only presume the 14-year-old Dickinson knew better how to spend his time than the 14-year-old Pickup then TBH.

SKY

 

[chalky]

Even this isn't quite as bad as The Wanderers 1999\2000, though at least people were saying England weren't even good enough to be touring (despite the presence of Atherton, Hussain, Stewart, Caddick, Gough and a Vaughan on his 1st tour) in that game, so it wasn't quite as bad as this.

Oh yes 2 for 4 with the 4 England Captains out

That was against Allan Donald & Shaun Pollock on a damp green seamer playing in the dark. I'd say this is worse.

 

[Richard]

SKY

Your mum\dad never heard of ONdigital then?