Invent a new Olympic event

[SillyCowCorner1]

Cow milking
Choking the chicken
Slapping lipstick on a pig

 

[Daemon]

Same events but naked

 

[Son Of Coco]

Cow milking
Choking the chicken
Slapping lipstick on a pig

Bashing the bishop.

We could have a figurative event and a literal event. Would help to clean out the Catholic church at the same time.

 

[reyrey]

Same events but naked

That's actually how the original (ancient Greek) Olympics were done.

 

[TheJediBrah]

Same events but naked

Imagine the ratings. Those corrupt IOC dudes would be able to buy their own countries (if they can't already) with the advertising revenue

I can already picture Usain Bolt flying down the track with it slapping along

 

[Line and Length]

Three-legged swimming (like the running version but in the pool).

 

[Coronis]

Same events but naked

Three-legged swimming (like the running version but in the pool).

Surely I’m not the only one.

Forum posting.

Depends. Is it judges scoring the event or a purely numbers based affair?

 

[andruid]

Sports betting

 

[sledger]

Forumer world cup

 

[Brook's side]

@nick-o
Small mindedness!!

 

[HeathDavisSpeed]

@nick-o
Small mindedness!!

Tedious lists

 

[Brook's side]

Tedious lists

My lists are consistently outstanding actually.
Far from being tedious, they could not only save people a lot of wasted time, but facilitate them finding entertainment and performance arts of the highest quality which they would never otherwise have enjoyed.

 

[Molehill]

Tedious lists

That no one reads......

What about score updates? Points awarded for accuracy, speed and lack of detail.

 

[ripper868]

10.25 in heat 3.

 

[Brook's side]

That no one reads......

Your lists have been interesting. I'm familiar with roughly 60% of your choices so there's stuff for me to investigate.

 

[Brook's side]

Top 15 ideas so far:

1. Somersaulting high jump (Brook’s side)
2. Orienteering (Brook’s side)
3. Hill running (Brook’s side)
4. Mountain climbing (Brook’s side)
5. Rollerskating (Brook’s side)
6. Assault course (Brook’s side)
7. Squat thrusts, sit ups and press ups (Brook’s side)
8. Underwater swimming (Brook’s side)
9. Target throwing (Brook’s side)
10. Flamenco dancing (Brook’s side)
11. Beep tests/shuttle runs (Brook’s side)
12. Gliding (Brook’s side)
13. Jousting (Brook’s side)
14. Tap Dancing (Brook’s side)
15. Stilt running (Brook’s side)

 

[Coronis]

Top 15 ideas so far:

1. Somersaulting high jump (Brook’s side)
2. Orienteering (Brook’s side)
3. Hill running (Brook’s side)
4. Mountain climbing (Brook’s side)
5. Rollerskating (Brook’s side)
6. Assault course (Brook’s side)
7. Squat thrusts, sit ups and press ups (Brook’s side)
8. Underwater swimming (Brook’s side)
9. Target throwing (Brook’s side)
10. Flamenco dancing (Brook’s side)
11. Beep tests/shuttle runs (Brook’s side)
12. Gliding (Brook’s side)
13. Jousting (Brook’s side)
14. Tap Dancing (Brook’s side)
15. Stilt running (Brook’s side)

Definitely read more than 10% of your post and didn’t dismiss it entirely by that point. As per usual.

 

[BoyBrumby]

Anything whilst pissed.

As anyone who has ever taken a drink will know, even the simplest of tasks become much trickier when, as I believe the current vernacular would have it, one is as pissed as a fart.

In the UK (bar Scotland) the legal drink drive blood alcohol content limit is 80 milligrams per 100 millilitres of blood, so all competitors should have a BAC of at least 200mg per 100ml.

How much more exciting would (say) boxing or bmx freestyle be if all the athletes were drunk as ****? How much concentration would it take just for sprinters to take their marks without falling off and/or chundering?

 

[Brook's side]

Definitely read more than 10% of your post and didn’t dismiss it entirely by that point. As per usual.

Relax man. It's just a bit of fun.

 

[howitzer]

Top 15 ideas so far:

1. Somersaulting high jump (Brook’s side)
2. Orienteering (Brook’s side)
3. Hill running (Brook’s side)
4. Mountain climbing (Brook’s side)
5. Rollerskating (Brook’s side)
6. Assault course (Brook’s side)
7. Squat thrusts, sit ups and press ups (Brook’s side)
8. Underwater swimming (Brook’s side)
9. Target throwing (Brook’s side)
10. Flamenco dancing (Brook’s side)
11. Beep tests/shuttle runs (Brook’s side)
12. Gliding (Brook’s side)
13. Jousting (Brook’s side)
14. Tap Dancing (Brook’s side)
15. Stilt running (Brook’s side)

Brook's side preparing for the tedious lists competition as we speak.