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Funny Commentary Quotes

la28

Cricket Spectator
"Sometimes you think he has nothing between his ears."
- Sanjay Manjrekar talking about shoaib akthar
 

thirdumpire

School Boy/Girl Captain
indian radio commentators of the past ...
"....the bowler runs up and bowls, the batsman knew nothing about it..."

so where was the batsman looking or was the bowler invisible :D
 

Sehwag309

Banned
Slater and Siva in Ind/Aus Chennai 04

Slater: Gillespie is very fine for Sehwag

Siva: Ya, between Sehwag and Dravid, Sehwag is the dominant partner
 

bryce

International Regular
I found some funny commentary quotes so i thought i'd share them.

From South Africa's Trevor Quirk:
"And there is the George Headley stand - it is named after George Headley".

From South Africa's Nic Collis:
"Omar Henry hit one or two boundaries in his seven".

From South Africa's Michael Abrahamson:
"A very small crowd here today. I can count the people on one hand - can't be any more than thirty".

From South Africa's Louis Karpus:
"We cross over now to the WACA for the match between Pakistan and Australia, where Richie Benaud is our commentator, so without further ado, it's over to the WACA, where Australia are playing Pakistan, our man, Richie Benaud, is waiting at the WACA, and it's Australia versus Pakistan, so over to you, Richie.

From an anonymous New Zealand commentator:
"Conditions are very cold indeed. There is Bryan Young, standing at first slip, wearing two sweaters, putting his hands in his pockets to keep warm between balls".

From New Zealand's Iain Gallaway:
"That was a lovely shot by Richard Hoskin, who has driven that ball through the covers for four. What a magnificent shot and the cloud craps".(crowd claps).

From an anonymous commentator:
"So the required runs needed are 67 from 11 overs and it doesn't take a calculator to tell us that the run rate is 6.0909 recurring".

From an anonymous Australian commentator:
-After a dropped catch, "**** he's missed it".

From an anonymous New Zealand commentator:
"There has been some heavy rain here at Jade Stadium, Christchurch - fourtunately it didn't touch the ground".

From an anonymous spectator:
"That player is a great bowler. He is so accurate - every time he bowls the ball, he finds the middle of the bat".

From England's John Arlott:
-On a very black West Indian, "There is the figure of Ivan Johnson fielding at fine leg. He is easily recognised by his sleeves, which are buttoned at the wrist".

From New Zealand's Jeremy Coney:
"There is Chris Harris, bowling another ball. It comes out of his hand like an inexperienced gynaecologist".

From England's Fred Trueman:
"Wally Hammond - what a great player he was. He was a great, great player. What a player. He was a great, great batsman - one of England's best. I never saw him play, but what a great player he was".
 
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PAKMAN

State 12th Man
bryce said:
I found some funny commentary quotes so i thought i'd share them.

From South Africa's Trevor Quirk:
"And there is the George Headley stand - it is named after George Headley".

From South Africa's Nic Collis:
"Omar Henry hit one or two boundaries in his seven".

From South Africa's Michael Abrahamson:
"A very small crowd here today. I can count the people on one hand - can't be any more than thirty".

From South Africa's Louis Karpus:
"We cross over now to the WACA for the match between Pakistan and Australia, where Richie Benaud is our commentator, so without further ado, it's over to the WACA, where Australia are playing Pakistan, our man, Richie Benaud, is waiting at the WACA, and it's Australia versus Pakistan, so over to you, Richie.

From an anonymous New Zealand commentator:
"Conditions are very cold indeed. There is Bryan Young, standing at first slip, wearing two sweaters, putting his hands in his pockets to keep warm between balls".

From New Zealand's Iain Gallaway:
"That was a lovely shot by Richard Hoskin, who has driven that ball through the covers for four. What a magnificent shot and the cloud craps".(crowd claps).

From an anonymous commentator:
"So the required runs needed are 67 from 11 overs and it doesn't take a calculator to tell us that the run rate is 6.0909 recurring".

From an anonymous Australian commentator:
-After a dropped catch, "**** he's missed it".

From an anonymous New Zealand commentator:
"There has been some heavy rain here at Jade Stadium, Christchurch - fourtunately it didn't touch the ground".

From an anonymous spectator:
"That player is a great bowler. He is so accurate - every time he bowls the ball, he finds the middle of the bat".

From England's John Arlott:
-On a very black West Indian, "There is the figure of Ivan Johnson fielding at fine leg. He is easily recognised by his sleeves, which are buttoned at the wrist".

From New Zealand's Jeremy Coney:
"There is Chris Harris, bowling another ball. It comes out of his hand like an inexperienced gynaecologist".

From England's Fred Trueman:
"Wally Hammond - what a great player he was. He was a great, great player. What a player. He was a great, great batsman - one of England's best. I never saw him play, but what a great player he was".
:D
 

Natman20

International Debutant
Wind

An Indian commentator said this in New Zealand when India was playing there

"Spit in the wind and it will come back and hit you in the face"
 

Dizzy #4

International 12th Man
Same guy: That Batsman is so lucky to have 25 runs given by the wicketkeeper (Some lower Division game)

very lame
 

Dydl

International Debutant
This isn't really funny....


BBC Commentator: And here's Miller coming up to bowl. He's got three short legs and one behind.
 

SirBloody Idiot

Cricketer Of The Year
Glen Mitchell: What was unique Kerry about the 3rd test between England & Australia back in the 1800's.

Kerry: Richie Benuad made his commentary debut.
 

SJS

Hall of Fame Member
Here are some I found :-

Viv Richards
Greg Thomas was bowling to Viv Richards in a county game. Viv missed a superb outswinger, and Thomas said "It's red, round and weighs about 5 ounces." The next ball, Viv hits Greg Thomas out of the ground and replies, "Greg, you know what it looks like. Go ahead and find it!"

Richie Benaud
"His throw went absolutely nowhere near where it was going."

"That slow motion replay doesn't show how fast the ball was travelling."

"There was a slight interruption there for athletics." (Referring to a streaker at Lord's.)

"Laird has been brought in to stand in the corner of the circle."

"He's usually a good puller - but he couldn't get it up that time."

Pete Sampras
"I don't know what these fellows are doing, but whatever they are doing, they sure are doing it well." (On watching Lara and Ambrose at Lord's.)

Fred Trueman
"That was a tremendous six, the ball was still in the air as it went over the boundary."

"Anyone foolish enough to predict the outcome of this match is a fool."

"Unless something happens that we can't predict, I don't think a lot will happen."

England vs. Australia, early '60s: Fred Trueman fielding close to the gate from the pavillion. As the new Aussie batsman came out to bat, he went to close the gate behind him as he walked onto the field.

Trueman: "Don't bother shutting it son, you won't be out there long enough."

Trevor Bailey
"On the first day, Logie decided to chance his arm and it came off."

Lord Mancroft
"Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented to give themselves some conception of eternity."

Allan Donald

Allan Donald playing in a county game for Warwickshire vs. Northants. Having taken a few of the Northants top order, Alan Lamb was on strike, looking to come forward. Donald noticed this, and dropped a couple short.

After the second one, Allan said, "Lambie, if you want to drive, go hire a car".

Next ball Donald pitched the ball right up, but Lamb was ready for it, and hit a beautiful cover drive straight to the boundary. "Go park that one", he drawled.
 

cricket player

International Debutant
lan healy:incase of 2 and 3 that ball is never put off tommorow what you can do today.

dean jones:inzimam ul haq runs people out to perfection.
 

Dizzy #4

International 12th Man
The fast bowlers, mainly Brett Lee, are a little loose on the top


Micheal Holding again, can he say anything right?
 

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