Five Stumps Only Way to Go

[Belford]

Not Camel56

I find myself being accused of being this bloke Camel56, and yet I have never heard of him.

However, I would prefer that I be suspected of being a talker of robust good sense like Camel56 than be suspected of being any of the rest of you cod-ordinary plod squadders.

Most of you are veritable cascading waterfalls of received opinion and non-thinking regurgitators of half-baked and then only semi-understood inside-back-page and Simon-O'Donnell-in-the-drinks-break-style non-opinions.

Camel56, Ray Hadley and Pinkline Jones excepted, the whole bunch of you combined know less about cricket than you do about finding girlfriends (of which you know zilch, if my guess about your stats-reading, Wisden-memorising private lives is correct).

 

[Richard]

Not like Camel56, no... just tries to do the same deduction of stuff you know absolutely sod-all about, exactly like he tries to...
God, I hope you four (and God-knows - maybe more) get chucked out of this place before you totally gum-up the works with your inerudite prattling on "plod" and various other catchphrases.

 

[Belford]

inerudite

Richard describes me as "inerudite", and then perpetrates the following phrase: "just tries to do the same deduction of stuff".

I would respond to it, but I can't tease out a meaning from the jumble of mis-used wordage.

Have another go Richard, only this time let the red mist subside first, and then consult a style manual and/or dictionary before you foist another bewildering non-sentence on an unsuspecting public.

By the way, I used Camel's appellation "plod" because I like it and because it fits you and your mates like a custom-made glove, not because Camel is known to me. Very clever coinage by Camel56, who runs rings around you when it comes to mental dexterity and entertainment value. I hope that sterling fellow doesn't mind me borrowing his apposite little invention.

 

[benchmark00]

Richard describes me as "inerudite", and then perpetrates the following phrase: "just tries to do the same deduction of stuff".

I would respond to it, but I can't tease out a meaning from the jumble of mis-used wordage.

Have another go Richard, only this time let the red mist subside first, and then consult a style manual and/or dictionary before you foist another bewildering non-sentence on an unsuspecting public.

By the way, I used Camel's appellation "plod" because I like it and because it fits you and your mates like a custom-made glove, not because Camel is known to me. Very clever coinage by Camel56, who runs rings around you when it comes to mental dexterity and entertainment value. I hope that sterling fellow doesn't mind me borrowing his apposite little invention.

Find something to do with your life, seriously

Is there a way for the Mods to check these peoples IP address? because i wouldnt mind having a bet that theyre all the same people.... one of them is too much.

 

[vic_orthdox]

is it really that hard to ignore someone's posts who you think are unnecessary? i do it to mine all the time

in saying this, i'll probably cop an awful spray, and i hope i do because i'll be able to chuckle at it, but i think surely we can enjoy the quirky comic stylings of the snoresome foursome, who really couldnt give two hoots about cricket but clearly provide some life to the forum.

 

[Richard]

If they want to do it somewhere they can do it elsewhere than our Cricket Chat as far as I'm concerned.
I'll let James and co. make their minds up, but if I was in charge I wouldn't allow it.

 

[Richard]

Richard describes me as "inerudite", and then perpetrates the following phrase: "just tries to do the same deduction of stuff".

I would respond to it, but I can't tease out a meaning from the jumble of mis-used wordage.

Have another go Richard, only this time let the red mist subside first, and then consult a style manual and/or dictionary before you foist another bewildering non-sentence on an unsuspecting public.

By the way, I used Camel's appellation "plod" because I like it and because it fits you and your mates like a custom-made glove, not because Camel is known to me. Very clever coinage by Camel56, who runs rings around you when it comes to mental dexterity and entertainment value. I hope that sterling fellow doesn't mind me borrowing his apposite little invention.

Hopefully he won't have the chance to mind anything, because hopefully he might be banned for good before long.
If you really expect anyone to believe that you four don't know each other it really would be better to post in manners that are not so hopelessly similar.
Because for anyone who doesn't know, that entire post could quite conceivably have been posted by Camel56.

 

[Pinkline Jones]

I'd like to nominate the following post by "Belford" for Cricket Forum's 2005 Post of the Year Awards.
Never seen such an alliaceous, teddy-bear-collecting dilettante, aka the likes of Richard, so brutally and brilliantly cyber-mauled. Please mop up now - nothing to see here folks.

Sorry Richard but you were a trifle foolhardy attempting a fight out of your class and weight division.

"Richard describes me as "inerudite", and then perpetrates the following phrase: "just tries to do the same deduction of stuff".

I would respond to it, but I can't tease out a meaning from the jumble of mis-used wordage.

Have another go Richard, only this time let the red mist subside first, and then consult a style manual and/or dictionary before you foist another bewildering non-sentence on an unsuspecting public.

By the way, I used Camel's appellation "plod" because I like it and because it fits you and your mates like a custom-made glove, not because Camel is known to me. Very clever coinage by Camel56, who runs rings around you when it comes to mental dexterity and entertainment value. I hope that sterling fellow doesn't mind me borrowing his apposite little invention."

 

[LongHopCassidy]

Post of the year? You uphill gardener, you.

Are you, Camel, and Hadley connected in any way, apart from your recalcitrant social commentary?

 

[Richard]

Err - I wonder...
Couldn't be the case that it's totally inconceivable that they're not, could it?
I wouldn't rule-out them going around all sorts of forums and causing as much disruption as possible, personally.

 

[Richard]

I'd like to nominate the following post by "Belford" for Cricket Forum's 2005 Post of the Year Awards.
Never seen such an alliaceous, teddy-bear-collecting dilettante, aka the likes of Richard, so brutally and brilliantly cyber-mauled. Please mop up now - nothing to see here folks.

Sorry Richard but you were a trifle foolhardy attempting a fight out of your class and weight division.

Really.
Funny how well I supposedly punched above my weight, then, isn't it?
It really is amusing to see you three's attempts to turn a tonne of bricks falling onto you into a positive outcome for yourselves.

 

[Pinkline Jones]

Yes Richard REALLY!

Now Richard let's get one thing straight here. When you write to Pinkline Jones you need to address me as "Dear Mr Jones", thank you very much, as I would similarly acknowledge you if you miraculously ever manage to achieve anything worthwhile. Meanwhile it's a real struggle isn't it Richard - having to wriggle your Fabio McDonald Statue of David body out of the bean bag so that you can get up and answer the door when your daily Merv Hughes Cricket Lover Pizza Special arrives.

So you reckon you fared all right in your one-sided stoush against Belford back there? Aha - very interesting inversion of logic you've got going there. Richard, you suffered one of the quickest cyber knockouts I've ever seen and your pathetic backout plan whenever you're in trouble is to run to the Moderator and try to manipulate him into banning people who have the wisdom, experience, and altruistic decency to quite rightly tear your pseudo paper machete non-arguments to shreds.

You can prattle on about "a tonne of bricks" and what not in your bizarre, twisted delusion that masks the pathos of your sandwich board man reality and maybe include this in a chapter of your soon to be released K-Tel autobiography "A Lifetime of Conversations with Myself" but really, you're only kidding YOURSELF, trying to evade the inevitable and honest character judgement which is - You're a namby pamby, Teddy Bear-collecting, Waldo Wiggins without a clue.

My generous advice would be for you to reassess where you're at, talk it over with a friend (oh sorry, a friend is someone who likes being with you and talking to you....err sorry mate), oh well just do the best you can in trying to complete the world's most difficult jigsaw puzzle i.e. the sand grain detritus of the little credibility you ever may have possessed. Good luck.

PINKLINE JONES A.O.
Australia's Leading Social Commentator

 

[Richard]

You seriously need to get real.
Or better still, get yourself banned like your fool of a mate.

 

[Belford]

Wildean repartee

"You seriously need to get real."

Just breaking my self-imposed exile to compliment you on that zinger, Richard.

You were right, Jones was wrong. I was the one punching above my weight - I didn't know you were capable of such Wildean flights of repartee.

Too bad the Algonquin round table isn't still going - you would have brained them with wit of that calibre.

 

[Richard]

Why break the exile - we were just starting to hope it might have been perminant.

 

[superkingdave]

I still wainting for the evidence that suggests Hadley is fit to polish Coleman's boots.

 

[Richard]

I still waiting for the evidence that these 4 are fit to grace the forums.




Well, in fact, I stopped waiting about the time they turned-up, and we all know it doesn't exist.

 

[BoyBrumby]

Ah, live & let live I say, in my w*nky, liberal English way.

Cricket can be altogether too po-faced at times & Pinkline & Belford especially aren't utterly devoid of wit, so I reckon it's nice to be shaken outta our complacency from time to time. If it's done with a wink & a smile so much the better.

Their writing styles are fairly similar (but then so are Chuck Bukowski's & James Ellroy's), which made me smell a rat, but the mods'd be all over 'em if it was the same user(s) so what the hey?!

Just make sure your sense of humour is engaged, sense of outrage disengaged & have that large pinch of salt handy.

 

[Langeveldt]

I think they should make the stumps out of one solid bit of wood, of course with the standard notches for bails, somehow making them just as easy to fall off..

Shove a huge sponsers logo on the "block", and it would cost sponsers such a fortune, but they would get massive exposure.. maybe we could donate the money to rebuilding the Galle stadium?

 

[Belford]

Illiterate

A bloke who spells permanent as "permanint" questioning my fitness to grace an internet forum. Delicious.

And a bloke who has made nearly 12000 posts to an internet site claiming moral authority to assess any human's fitness to do anything, apart from order a pizza and watch the late night foreign movies in the hope of catching a glimpse of nudity - priceless.