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Children's Cricket Stories
- Thread starter Neil Pickup
- Start date
SJS
Hall of Fame Member
Indian kid.
Thin with starved-just-arrived-from-Somalia looks.
Son of the corner Patel.
Father wants him to concentrate on studies to become a doctor/engineer like Mr Singh's son but he wants to be the next Gower or the next Kumble.
Stands listlessly in the corner but is totally transformed with a bat/ball in his hand.
Speaks few words and if you arent listening carefully you may miss his innate sense of humour and polite sarcasm
Thin with starved-just-arrived-from-Somalia looks.
Son of the corner Patel.
Father wants him to concentrate on studies to become a doctor/engineer like Mr Singh's son but he wants to be the next Gower or the next Kumble.
Stands listlessly in the corner but is totally transformed with a bat/ball in his hand.
Speaks few words and if you arent listening carefully you may miss his innate sense of humour and polite sarcasm
33/3from3.3
International Vice-Captain
the left hand opener who used to play for the main rivals
but hates it there because he's teased for being short/tall/fat/skinny/ginger/foreign
ends up playing for the good team and hitting a 6 in the last ball of the final to beat his old team
bowls accurate lobs
but hates it there because he's teased for being short/tall/fat/skinny/ginger/foreign
ends up playing for the good team and hitting a 6 in the last ball of the final to beat his old team
bowls accurate lobs
Slow Love™
International Captain
LOL.BoyBrumby said:Chippy Canadian communist of Indian extraction who blames the evils of the western world when he gets an iffy LBW decision?
Character is entirely fictional. Any similarity, blah, blah....
It seems like so far quite a few nerds and misfit type characters have been suggested - perhaps a more average gentle-giant type character with brute strength but a good nature could be in there.
Any place in the story for a girl? I never read these kinds of things as a kid, and what little I've seen suggests a more antiquated "boys' own" style. I once saw a movie with Rodney Dangerfield about a girl's soccer team where he forced his son to dress up as a girl so that they'd win all their games...
Neil Pickup
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Thought I'd get round to updating y'all.
We've decided on our characters and have outlined a basic plot skeleton. Research (i.e. sending Harry to go and raid his little brother's bookcase) has indicated that these sort of books are, on average, around about 30,000 words long. I wasn't particularly delighted with that finding... but I've made a start.
We've balanced out the 'unusual' characters with quite a few more 'normal' children and I think that I'm managing to build a bit of chemistry between them. I've completed the first chapter of what will probably be about ten, and the tally is currently at around about 3,000 words. A sneak preview follows (it comes midway through chapter one), but don't expect to get the whole book here as I thoroughly intend to try getting the thing published, especially if (as looks quite likely) I spend all my Xmas break writing it...
The man’s voice rung out again. Lewis could make out a soft yet unmistakeable Northern accent. ‘Well, there are two boys standing there with a cricket bat. Either you’re about to humiliate them in front of the entire school or they’re demonstrating how to play the summer game.’
A handful of stifled giggles came from the crowd of children. Mrs Cottingham was losing control of the situation. It was a set of circumstances that she didn’t like and wasn’t used to. Her eyes locked onto Mr Heath’s face and her eyebrows narrowed, missiles selecting their next target. ‘These boys’, she blustered, thrusting an angry finger in the direction of Lewis and Daniel, ‘hit this into my coffee from the other side of the yard.’ She held up the tennis ball as if it were a murder weapon.
The man’s eyes widened. ‘What, right in the middle? That’s some shot. I’d be delighted if I got it close.’
This time there was no mistaking the laughter from the sea of red sweatshirts. The wrinkles on Mrs Cottingham’s forehead began to tremble. ‘May I remind you that I have been teaching at this school since before you were born?’
‘Which suggests that I can remember rather better what it was like to be in the position these lads are in now, doesn’t it?’ Mr Heath’s reply was quick, and his eyes remained an icy cool.
‘I don’t think you understand the magnitude of the situation!’ The woman angrily snapped back.
Mr Heath paused, gently letting some of the heat out of their exchange. ‘The boys hit the ball into your coffee. That’s what you said and that’s what we should be dealing with.’ His tone of voice was un-altered.
‘We?’ Mrs Cottingham seemed to take the man’s last words as a personal insult.
‘Yes, Mrs Cottingham. We. Unless, of course, you don’t think that the boys’ class teacher should have any input into their discipline?’ His last sentence set another excited buzz across the school yard.
Mrs Cottingham was beaten. ‘My coffee’, she stammered, limply holding out the half-empty mug.
‘Will this do? Black with no sugars?’ Mr Heath casually offered his own drink to the other teacher, swapping it for the incriminating tennis ball. He turned to the watching children. ‘Nothing more to see, guys and girls. Bell’s going in a minute, anyway.’
The crowd began to dissolve back into its separate friendship groups once again. Gossip and chatter broke up the silence that had followed the conclusion of the two teachers’ dispute. Mr Heath spun to face Lewis and Daniel. He lobbed the tennis ball back to the smaller of the two boys and spoke in a quieter tone of voice. ‘Just keep the ball on the deck in future, okay? Good hit, but that would have gone straight down the fielder’s throat. See you after the bell goes.’ The teacher smiled and walked back towards the school building, leaving the two boys to digest the events of the past few minutes.
We've decided on our characters and have outlined a basic plot skeleton. Research (i.e. sending Harry to go and raid his little brother's bookcase) has indicated that these sort of books are, on average, around about 30,000 words long. I wasn't particularly delighted with that finding... but I've made a start.
We've balanced out the 'unusual' characters with quite a few more 'normal' children and I think that I'm managing to build a bit of chemistry between them. I've completed the first chapter of what will probably be about ten, and the tally is currently at around about 3,000 words. A sneak preview follows (it comes midway through chapter one), but don't expect to get the whole book here as I thoroughly intend to try getting the thing published, especially if (as looks quite likely) I spend all my Xmas break writing it...
The man’s voice rung out again. Lewis could make out a soft yet unmistakeable Northern accent. ‘Well, there are two boys standing there with a cricket bat. Either you’re about to humiliate them in front of the entire school or they’re demonstrating how to play the summer game.’
A handful of stifled giggles came from the crowd of children. Mrs Cottingham was losing control of the situation. It was a set of circumstances that she didn’t like and wasn’t used to. Her eyes locked onto Mr Heath’s face and her eyebrows narrowed, missiles selecting their next target. ‘These boys’, she blustered, thrusting an angry finger in the direction of Lewis and Daniel, ‘hit this into my coffee from the other side of the yard.’ She held up the tennis ball as if it were a murder weapon.
The man’s eyes widened. ‘What, right in the middle? That’s some shot. I’d be delighted if I got it close.’
This time there was no mistaking the laughter from the sea of red sweatshirts. The wrinkles on Mrs Cottingham’s forehead began to tremble. ‘May I remind you that I have been teaching at this school since before you were born?’
‘Which suggests that I can remember rather better what it was like to be in the position these lads are in now, doesn’t it?’ Mr Heath’s reply was quick, and his eyes remained an icy cool.
‘I don’t think you understand the magnitude of the situation!’ The woman angrily snapped back.
Mr Heath paused, gently letting some of the heat out of their exchange. ‘The boys hit the ball into your coffee. That’s what you said and that’s what we should be dealing with.’ His tone of voice was un-altered.
‘We?’ Mrs Cottingham seemed to take the man’s last words as a personal insult.
‘Yes, Mrs Cottingham. We. Unless, of course, you don’t think that the boys’ class teacher should have any input into their discipline?’ His last sentence set another excited buzz across the school yard.
Mrs Cottingham was beaten. ‘My coffee’, she stammered, limply holding out the half-empty mug.
‘Will this do? Black with no sugars?’ Mr Heath casually offered his own drink to the other teacher, swapping it for the incriminating tennis ball. He turned to the watching children. ‘Nothing more to see, guys and girls. Bell’s going in a minute, anyway.’
The crowd began to dissolve back into its separate friendship groups once again. Gossip and chatter broke up the silence that had followed the conclusion of the two teachers’ dispute. Mr Heath spun to face Lewis and Daniel. He lobbed the tennis ball back to the smaller of the two boys and spoke in a quieter tone of voice. ‘Just keep the ball on the deck in future, okay? Good hit, but that would have gone straight down the fielder’s throat. See you after the bell goes.’ The teacher smiled and walked back towards the school building, leaving the two boys to digest the events of the past few minutes.
Jungle Jumbo
International Vice-Captain
Neil, I presume you've also thought of different 'personalities' of the teams you are playing. Here's my two cents...
- Arrogant League Champions with superstar batsmen and deadly fast bowlers
- Awful village team with an idyllic past, somehow your team becomes slightly unstuck against them, maybe a first-round cup scare by one wicket or something
- Expat Asian team or similar, maybe with multiple spinners and wristy top order
- Local rivals, about same level
- Really rich, posh snobbish team - public school - possible also the arrogant league champions
- Brutal, nasty side with sloggers and vicious fast bowlers - maybe lots of sledging and biased umps
I presume this is set in England?
- Arrogant League Champions with superstar batsmen and deadly fast bowlers
- Awful village team with an idyllic past, somehow your team becomes slightly unstuck against them, maybe a first-round cup scare by one wicket or something
- Expat Asian team or similar, maybe with multiple spinners and wristy top order
- Local rivals, about same level
- Really rich, posh snobbish team - public school - possible also the arrogant league champions
- Brutal, nasty side with sloggers and vicious fast bowlers - maybe lots of sledging and biased umps
I presume this is set in England?
Barney Rubble
International Coach
It's set in a very small village in England, yes.Jungle Jumbo said:
Neil Pickup
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Cheers, appreciated.Blaze said:
Neil Pickup
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What I'm looking to do with this book (I need to get a title soon) is follow more closely the development of the school team and the characters within it. The opposition schools play, for the most part, little beyond supporting roles to build the Bradstock Primary School (that's the central school in the story) characters against.Jungle Jumbo said:
There a couple of exceptions, which naturally lead into more critical/central parts of the storyline - I think I've named them Durban Primary (following the theme in the UK of naming turn-of-the-century constructs after South African places in the aftermath of the Boer War) as the more confrontational side and Falconwood Prep for the chief antagonists.
Right arm fast
State Vice-Captain
so far these are sounding really good. keep it up!!
Neil Pickup
Request Your Custom Title Now!
Ten year olds read Harry Potter.andyc said:
33/3from3.3
International Vice-Captain
great little read, Neil. I like it maybe a little complex for 10year olds . BTW are you gonna add my player in there please. could you name him Arnie or Larry. If he's in it at all . It's great so far. Neil, a little advice for the book - just write it, and then read it, then you'll think of a good title.
. It's great so far. Neil, a little advice for the book - just write it, and then read it, then you'll think of a good title.
chooka_nick
International 12th Man
Neil... be sure to keep it a little less like Glory Gardens. And this is some who, in year seven, read the entire series and received an e-mail from the author.Neil Pickup said:
But go for it. Good plot so far.