Eyup, C_C, yowth. Tha nose bogger all baht what folks is like ower ere, what meks em tick, ow the fact that way've 'ad Romans, a bunch o Scandinavians an' a bucket-load o' Frogs carvin t'country up now an' agin, leavin' tha stamp on all on us - but nor everyone t'same. Tek the missus. Oh's a Bosworth - ad summat ter do wi Bozzuth Fields an sum battle where this bloke called Richard gorra claat, and oh's folks's dotty rich. As fer may, ah talks different ter oh, cos ahm from near Ilson, so ah avner gorra plum in me gob. Way were born in't same shire in't same wik, thray mile apart, burritsa diffrent world. So shurrup tha prairtle, tha nose sodall.
Seen one city in England, you've seen them all? Try going to Sunderland and calling the local inhabitants Geordies - they'll tear you a new bottom before you can sing "Blaydon Races".