HOVESHIRE HAWK DOWN!
Brutal, ruthless, clinical - Whichever adjective you choose to apply to this cricketing dissection, what it came down to was that Cymru Gurgitaters wanted it more than fellow title-contenders Hoveshire Hawks. The Gurs opening bowlers, Prof/Comp Wilde and Qual/Prof Bewers had stripped off their pullovers even before visiting captain Nickels had called incorrectly and been asked to bat.
With Vayro's instructions to go for it ringing in the players ears, it wasn't long until the crowd could also play their part in baying for South coast blood, as young Australian Sup Draper suffered the indignity of a golden duck edging Wilde through to Noon in the first over. It was a fate which was also to befall No.3 Resp Butler, as Bewers removed his middle stump with his first delivery, to leave the Hawks' innings well and truly decapitated on 4/2 after two.
What hopes of resuscitation remained in the visitors' dressingroom laid squarely on the shoulders of Qual Kean and Strong Lees, but when the former was caught flat-footed for 12, to give Wilde his second victim, and the latter was quite brilliantly stumped by Noon off Bewers, it seemed as though rigor-mortis had set in at 35/4.
The spin twins of Sup/Prof Bridges M and Strong/Prof Cash then set about the last rights as order disintegrated in the Hawks' ranks. Keeper/batsman Mccafferty raced to 8, but having already struck two boundaries in the over, recklessly aimed another hay-maker against the spin of Bridges M, and unsurprisingly had his off stump pegged back. Similarly irresponsible ends were in store for Rendle (5/6) and captain Nickels, (17/19) when they became the first two of four scalps for Cash, as he ratcheted up the pressure with a delicious spell of seductively-flighted left-arm spin.
However, Strong Bat Shura, mysteriously banished to the nether reaches of the order, along with genuine tail-enders Dewhurst and Quek, did at least show some fighting qualities, with Dewhurst hitting a lusty 12 in a 19 run ninth wicket partnership, before Quek lasted an improbable 25 deliveries for his contribution of 2 towards a final stand of 16. But when Resp/Feeb Bent struck Quek plumb in front, The Hawks were still five short of their hundred, with Shura stranded on 18*
Yet if The Gurs thought this was to be a valedictory stroll towards glory, they were very much mistaken, as a desperate Hawks side made them sweat, at least for the first ten overs. The baffling disparity between Noon's league form and that of his Blind Cricket Challenge campaign was never more evident, as he gifted a chance to Mccafferty off just the second ball of the innings from Qual RFM Quek. Patel, (11/15) and Cash (22/19) were also to succumb to the Australian paceman, but Greening, (41*/44) held firm to watch from the non-striker's end as Mohammed lifted Rendle into the stand for a maximum to stumble, rather than march across the finish-line in the 19th over.
The result draws The Gurs level with the Hawks on 32 points, but such was the nature of the NRR swing, that it effectively knocks the Hove side out of the title race. Who's Your Daddy still enjoy a four point cushion over Vayro's men, but with trips to Hoveshire Hawks and fourth-placed Wrong'uns in their last three matches, The Gurs are now poised to capitalise on their slightest slip-up.
Cymru Gurgitaters Hoveshire Hawks
Top Order: superb proficient
Middle Order: respectable competent
Lower Order: abysmal abysmal
Seam Bowling: proficient proficient
Spin Bowling: strong proficient
Fielding: feeble feeble
*MOTM: Greening
BTW, has anyone noticed anything strange going on with BT this afternoon? Since the end of my game, the pages keep refreshing every five or so seconds - Leaping to the top of the screen and making it impossible for me to read anything with my speech software!
Later, Trev
managed to nearly win my match despitehaving an utterly dire line-up. This match pretty much sums up how gun the rest of my league really is....
