Fake IPL Player - Very interesting blog

[jeevan]

I had half-expected this thread to be about Atul Sharma

 

[Athlai]

'only to piss the opposition off' 'are all pumped up for the' 'We went in, we got ****ed, and we came out. ' 'I have full faith in my team' 'It was discussed whether Lordie should be brought into the fold, but Mangal (who probably fancies himself as skipper for the next season)' 'But, the dude must have' 'Come on man. Cut the crap' 'But Lordie is a smart dude. He knows there's very little he can do with this bunch of players. Why clean up after others have crapped all over the house'

The language patterns and use of a few certain phrases indicate a few things to me.

1) It isn't an Indian
2) The possibility of it being a player is quite real, the writer is very involved in the setup either in reality or their own head as the use of words such as 'my' and 'we' become quite casual in the writing itself.
3) Why doesn't McCullum have a singular nickname besides Phoren Babas and Skipper?
4) The Indian slang is only in names.

 

[masterblaster]

'only to piss the opposition off' 'are all pumped up for the' 'We went in, we got ****ed, and we came out. ' 'I have full faith in my team' 'It was discussed whether Lordie should be brought into the fold, but Mangal (who probably fancies himself as skipper for the next season)' 'But, the dude must have' 'Come on man. Cut the crap' 'But Lordie is a smart dude. He knows there's very little he can do with this bunch of players. Why clean up after others have crapped all over the house'

The language patterns and use of a few certain phrases indicate a few things to me.

1) It isn't an Indian
2) The possibility of it being a player is quite real, the writer is very involved in the setup either in reality or their own head as the use of words such as 'my' and 'we' become quite casual in the writing itself.
3) Why doesn't McCullum have a singular nickname besides Phoren Babas and Skipper?
4) The Indian slang is only in names.

1) Disagree. Are you implying that Indian people have different English language patterns and don't speak the same way as somebody in a western country would?

2) Very well could be as you suggest, he seems to be quite involved with the team

3) Have no idea

4) So what?

 

[Jono]

1) Disagree. Are you implying that Indian people have different English language patterns and don't speak the same way as somebody in a western country would?

I do think it reduces the chance of it being an Indian player. Of course one can't rule it out, but I don't think its unfair stereotyping to suggest that.

Particularly since on this same board we've had talks about how cultural differences exist with the word 'bastard'.

 

[Pratters]

I read it once but it didn't interest me. It is hilarious if KKR are actually banning laptops, internet and stuff though.

 

[Jono]

I thought internet was already banned in change rooms (as well as mobile phones) for match fixing reasons.

 

[Athlai]

1) Disagree. Are you implying that Indian people have different English language patterns and don't speak the same way as somebody in a western country would?

2) Very well could be as you suggest, he seems to be quite involved with the team

3) Have no idea

4) So what?

1) Yes every country that speaks English has its own language patterns and colloquialisms. I meant this is no way to offend anyone its just a statement of fact and is keyed only to how the the phrases used appear to be more Australian/New Zealand and to a lesser extent British than another English speaking country. The slang used I'd identify more with these countries than Indian. Most of the phrases I had quoted were to that purpose.

4) My point here was that why only names? Why not phrases and language patterns? If I'm right in my guess that its a non-Indian player this would imply that the slang names have been picked up by someone else. Or possibly if they are in the team by the Indian core group of players.

 

[masterblaster]

1) Yes every country that speaks English has its own language patterns and colloquialisms. I meant this is no way to offend anyone its just a statement of fact and is keyed only to how the the phrases used appear to be more Australian/New Zealand and to a lesser extent British than another English speaking country. The slang used I'd identify more with these countries than Indian. Most of the phrases I had quoted were to that purpose.

4) My point here was that why only names? Why not phrases and language patterns? If I'm right in my guess that its a non-Indian player this would imply that the slang names have been picked up by someone else. Or possibly if they are in the team by the Indian core group of players.

Yeah you're probably right on both counts but I still wouldn't rule out the fact that it could be an Indian person typing this up. A lot of these Indian players have had County Cricket exposure like Ajit Agarkar and Murali Kartik and I know have played a lot in England.

Murali Kartik's English for example is superb and speaks with the same style as many people from western countries do. Not saying it's him, but it still could be an Indian person typing this up.

But it doesn't matter and certainly there was no offense caused from your end

 

[sirdj]

The language patterns and use of a few certain phrases indicate a few things to me.

1) It isn't an Indian
2) The possibility of it being a player is quite real, the writer is very involved in the setup either in reality or their own head as the use of words such as 'my' and 'we' become quite casual in the writing itself.
3) Why doesn't McCullum have a singular nickname besides Phoren Babas and Skipper?
4) The Indian slang is only in names.

Disagree here is stuff that he wrote in Hindi which I am pretty sure a Kiwi or Aussie can't write :-

The Prince had to pull him away and was heard saying, "Saale. Kiss-se panga le raha hai? Agar yeh thappad maarega naa toh rone laayak bhi nahin rahega". Unfortunately, better sense prevailed and Appam wasn't seen near PKB for the rest of the evening.

and 2gether they ride
chori, chori tonight
2gether they hide
chori, chori, tonight
2gether they ride, 2gether they hide,
2gether they fly, into the sky,
2gether they rise above the world,
2gether they return, chori chori everynight

Some of the stuff written on the blog seemed to match the grapevine that they had heard too. One of them went and asked one senior player about it. Who, apparently, asked "Eyi Blog Maane Kee?". Eventually, it was reported to the management and the CEO with his team took a look at it. They want to catch me within 24 hours. And a witch hunt is on.


I asked him how does his affect his strategy. He blabbered something like "strategy kya hai yaar, lekin pata toh hona chahiye na ki pitch kya hai".

So its definitely an Indian.......probably a journo who is pissed with the Ganguly-removal business.

 

[Sanz]

'
The language patterns and use of a few certain phrases indicate a few things to me.

1) It isn't an Indian.

4) My point here was that why only names? Why not phrases and language patterns? If I'm right in my guess that its a non-Indian player this would imply that the slang names have been picked up by someone else. Or possibly if they are in the team by the Indian core group of players.

It is an Indian. And the slangs are used in other part of the post as well. for example :-

" But, it'll take them some time to do so. Becoz "impression ek din mein nahin banta"."

"..building a cricket team is slightly different from selling liquor or masala movies..."

"Saale. Kiss-se panga le raha hai? Agar yeh thappad maarega naa toh rone laayak bhi nahin rahega".

 

[Xuhaib]

Yeah an Indian journo definetley btw good to see Shastri still going strong in the ladies department despite the advancing age.

 

[TT Boy]

His wife must be happy.

 

[neutralguy]

My speculation is it could be a journalist who supports ganguly and indian players, but associated very closely with the team.
Could possibly be "sanjay jha" editor of cricketnext.com, from the writing style or may be arun lal (remote chances).

 

[CDAK]

'only to piss the opposition off' 'are all pumped up for the' 'We went in, we got ****ed, and we came out. ' 'I have full faith in my team' 'It was discussed whether Lordie should be brought into the fold, but Mangal (who probably fancies himself as skipper for the next season)' 'But, the dude must have' 'Come on man. Cut the crap' 'But Lordie is a smart dude. He knows there's very little he can do with this bunch of players. Why clean up after others have crapped all over the house'

The language patterns and use of a few certain phrases indicate a few things to me.

1) It isn't an Indian

Pls go through Chetan Bhagath's novels; (eg:5 point someone, etc)

3) Why doesn't McCullum have a singular nickname besides Phoren Babas and Skipper?

U mean, McCullum himself? Common, he has better things to do.

4) The Indian slang is only in names.

More than enough to know it's an Indian

 

[CDAK]

Just by reading the "battle of losers "(blog on 28th april), I had commented it could be a journalist.But after reading the entire blogs, now my guess work points towards Akash chopra(like many had already guessed), because
1) he is a column-writer with good writing skills (used to write for some UK based website)
2) Akash is called shakespear in the blog; why? because he writes things, even the blog itself
3) he was a saurav-supporter
4) he is one of those who has bn sent back
5) delhi players seem to be his friends
6) After sending him back, the blog doesn't deal much internal stuff

...and much more.

I

 

[profernity]

Overall I don't like the idea behind this blog. On the one hand it provides good gossip, but on the other hand it's got this schoolboy jeering tone about it that's off putting. And the fact that the widespread mystery and intrigue affects the way the team operates (if the posts are to be believed) makes the writing of the blog an irresponsible act too. Fun for the rest of us, but actually very unprofessional.

 

[silentstriker]

The unprofessional part of it is what makes it awesome. And judging by the posts, the Kolkata franchise isn't exactly the height of professionalism either.

 

[silentstriker]

New entry up:

Calypso King is leaving us and his departure isn't in very pleasant circumstances. The team management threw an early farewell party for him after the last defeat. Dildo wasn't around to sponsor this one though, so it went from the team kitty. No one was particularly pleased with the idea of hanging out together, although no one objected to it openly. Since, the posts have been coming out, guys are making their own small groups and going out to places without informing others. No one wants Fake IPL Player to land up there and broadcast their nefarious activities to the whole world. In fact, the blog has affected the nocturnal lives of IPLers in more ways than one would have expected. Teams are now trying to find out before hand where our team is headed after the match, to ensure that they don't land up at the same place. Kishen Kanhaiyya, whose tour took an unexpected turn after the Opium Night expose, is having the driest tour ever in his life. Little Sister has still not given in to the Sheikh's famed magic. Little John's been getting frantic phone calls from his Mom and he's had to promise her that he will return to India "Ganga jaisa pavitra" (I couldn't believe my ears myself but these ARE the exact words he used). So, in the backdrop of all this, we had to go for Calypso's farewell party.

While the drinks flowed, the music blared, Calypso suggested to Skipper that he should tattoo his IPL scores. (For the uninitiated, the skipper has tattooed his cricketing numbers in Roman numerals on his arms.) WHile the skipper was thinking about what to say, Calypso started a discussion on whether there's a Zero in Roman, obviously referring to the skipper's ducks during the tournament. Finally, in drunken stupor, the skipper reacted with a few choicest words of his own. He was eventually whisked away by Candy Nickle to avoid a blow down.

......

And finally:

P.P.P.P.P.S. I have decided to retire from all forms of cricket after IPL. I will disclose my identity on our last match day.

That does imply its Chopra. Also, he could be sued if he does reveal his identity.

 

[andruid]

I find this blog written in very poor taste. Whoever is this is a pretty sick individual who has no life.

Doctors reported Sanz's Sense of Humour By-Pass Surgery an unqualified success......

Its hilarious

 

[Matt79]

Finally something involving the IPL I found interesting!