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Cricket stuff that doesn't deserve its own thread
- Thread starter Daemon
- Start date
Hurricane2
U19 Cricketer
This is a joke post.
Rules changes I would like to see to Cricket
1) Lbw appeals must be made at a volume over 100 decibels. Quiet appeals will not be considered. This is to create more crowd attendance.
2) Fighting will be allowed in matches and batsman may use their bats. If the sledgers of the world want to continue to swear at batsman under those conditions then good luck to them. The upside of this law is that some players will be selected as enforcers. Which could finally lead to a long overdue international debut for the likes of Luke Vivian.
3) Between overs 20 to 30 of an ODI there must be a period of "Spin play". The bowling side may put unlimited fielders on the outer to restrict the scoring to endless singles. The advantage of this rule is that it honours the memory of the poster known as Bruce Campbell and it allows everyone to nip to the super market for some snacks and make it back to the match without missing any important part of the match.
4) The West Indies have an expression "To Jackie" the strike. It means to score a single off the last ball of the over and steal the strike. Anyone who jackies the strike more than twice in a ten over bracket must receive a stern rebuke from the umpire and the commentators, especially Simon Doull.
5) Ball tampering will be allowed. This is not a new suggestion as I believe Alan Donald advocated for being allowed to use any natural means eg finger nails and sweat. My suggestion is that any substances and devices be allowed. This will radically increase the use of technology in cricket. The rationale for this rule is to make cricket more like the America's Cup yachting. The America's cup captured the world's attention in the 1980s with Australia 2's secret winged keel that was kept under lock and key and hidden from the media. Likewise teams could work on the ball over night in a test match and it would be exciting to see how much more it would swing the next day. The only rule is that you may not substitute the ball after 80 overs given that you are allowed to keep pouring shampoo on one side etc.
Thanks
Rules changes I would like to see to Cricket
1) Lbw appeals must be made at a volume over 100 decibels. Quiet appeals will not be considered. This is to create more crowd attendance.
2) Fighting will be allowed in matches and batsman may use their bats. If the sledgers of the world want to continue to swear at batsman under those conditions then good luck to them. The upside of this law is that some players will be selected as enforcers. Which could finally lead to a long overdue international debut for the likes of Luke Vivian.
3) Between overs 20 to 30 of an ODI there must be a period of "Spin play". The bowling side may put unlimited fielders on the outer to restrict the scoring to endless singles. The advantage of this rule is that it honours the memory of the poster known as Bruce Campbell and it allows everyone to nip to the super market for some snacks and make it back to the match without missing any important part of the match.
4) The West Indies have an expression "To Jackie" the strike. It means to score a single off the last ball of the over and steal the strike. Anyone who jackies the strike more than twice in a ten over bracket must receive a stern rebuke from the umpire and the commentators, especially Simon Doull.
5) Ball tampering will be allowed. This is not a new suggestion as I believe Alan Donald advocated for being allowed to use any natural means eg finger nails and sweat. My suggestion is that any substances and devices be allowed. This will radically increase the use of technology in cricket. The rationale for this rule is to make cricket more like the America's Cup yachting. The America's cup captured the world's attention in the 1980s with Australia 2's secret winged keel that was kept under lock and key and hidden from the media. Likewise teams could work on the ball over night in a test match and it would be exciting to see how much more it would swing the next day. The only rule is that you may not substitute the ball after 80 overs given that you are allowed to keep pouring shampoo on one side etc.
Thanks
Starfighter
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TheJediBrah
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That's why I always call in sick the day of my performance reviews. Can't fire you if you're not there.
honestbharani
Whatever it takes!!!
yeah one off test in Ireland as warm up to one off test in England should serve us well.
srbhkshk
International Captain
You won't be saying the same once we lose them both.
honestbharani
Whatever it takes!!!
Why not? Better to prepare and lose than to not prepare at all and lose.
If we have to lose one, I would rather lose the Ireland game. We deserve the series win in England, damnit.
Victor Ian
International Coach
India deserve nothing. It's about time they stopped abusing h&s rules to their advantage.
H&S?
Victor Ian
International Coach
Leaving due to covid to protect series.
Pant batting but someone else keeping.
India have benefitted from a number of rules recently.
Pant batting but someone else keeping.
India have benefitted from a number of rules recently.
To be frank though there are bowlers who have surprisingly underperformed in England, the likes of Dale Steyn and Mitch Johnson come to mind. They feel more at home with the kookaburra ball and hard pitches probably.
And then you have someone like Zaheer Khan who was very effective with the Duke ball but not the kookaburra. Fast bowling is a lot more complicated than what it seems.
Victor Ian
International Coach
I haven't paid much attention, but how is Pant's keeping progressing?
honestbharani
Whatever it takes!!!
This is worse than your 36 post.
TheJediBrah
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oh yeah I forgot about that. Blatant (legal) cheating.
Victor Ian
International Coach
Seems I've hit a nerve. No denying India abused the wicket keeper rule.
Victor Ian
International Coach
Did it happen twice, or just once? Can't remember. Maybe they just talked about it could happen the second time.
TheJediBrah
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Don't think it happened twice but it a real gobsmack when they did it because it was so blatant, especially with all the talk about Pant's keeping issues before the game and the selection quandry, which was essentially "Pant is a way better bat, but Saha is a way better keeper". Turns out they just went "**** it, just use both we can get away with it"