Commentary Complaints Thread

[Uppercut]

He attempts to do the Mark Lawrenson dry critical thing, but it doesn't work.

I think I found Lawrenson worse. He wasn’t quite as stupid as Murphy, but he was much more relentlessly negative. It was like watching with Tony Soprano’s mother.

 

[Furball]

“Surprised how hard Lewandowski works for a superstar”.
Don’t give up the day job.

He's played under Klopp and Guardiola, two managers who famously love lazy bastards up front.

 

[Red_Ink_Squid]

Not a new observation but Danny Murphy is like a miserable pub bore

It was Uppercut in the last Euro's commentary complaints thread who opened my eyes to how bad Murphy is. I'd never paid him enough attention to notice before.

Once it's pointed out to you you can't 'unsee' it though.

 

[Furball]

I think I found Lawrenson worse. He wasn’t quite as stupid as Murphy, but he was much more relentlessly negative. It was like watching with Tony Soprano’s mother.

Lawrenson was paid to fly out to Brazil and watch football for a month and made it sound like the most miserable existence in the world.

 

[Furball]

Super referring to Giroud as 'not easy on the eye' must surely be the first time he's ever been described as that.

 

[BoyBrumby]

I think I found Lawrenson worse. He wasn’t quite as stupid as Murphy, but he was much more relentlessly negative. It was like watching with Tony Soprano’s mother.

Ha, exactly this. If one was not impressed by Mark being unimpressed his schtick got very old very quickly.

And all delivered in his oddly camp high pitched northern drawl; it was like being dissed by Alan Bennett if he'd come from Preston and played centre half for Liverpool.

 

[MW1304]

I think I found Lawrenson worse. He wasn’t quite as stupid as Murphy, but he was much more relentlessly negative. It was like watching with Tony Soprano’s mother.

I realise I made it sound like it did work for Lawrenson. Not so.

Tbf my early memory of Lawrenson was some funny-to-a-ten-year-old quips on an old FIFA. Something about a magic sponge.

Maybe he worked okay once upon a time, but yeah latter day Lawrenson was even more of a miseryguts.

 

[Furball]

I can't decide which is more annoying; linesmen who wait before flagging marginal offsides or commentators who complain about it.

 

[Lillian Thomson]

Poch needs a real job.

 

[Victor Ian]

I'm a big non fan of GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLL.

 

[Furball]

Not a commentary complaint as such, but why is the graphic which shows how the players line up backwards?

 

[Lillian Thomson]

I’ve been watching re-runs of the Big Match from 1975 and Martin Tyler is the producer. Not overly relevant, but there you have it.

 

[MW1304]

I'm a big non fan of GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLL.

Was entertaining the first time, but diminishing returns.

 

[Uppercut]

Do we mean the Spanish language commentator version? Gol rather than Goal? I love that one but if English speakers are trying to copy it then that's lame.

 

[Furball]

Aye, it's one of those things that doesn't work in English.

Personally find it really contrived, there's a Brazilian (I think) commentator who'll rabbit on for a few seconds, take a breath then go for a big long GOOOOOOOOOL which sounds rubbish.

 

[Victor Ian]

Do we mean the Spanish language commentator version? Gol rather than Goal? I love that one but if English speakers are trying to copy it then that's lame.

I've heard it a few times. I've been listening to the Arab and french commentary because my wife has gone nuts for this WC. She's Moroccan and watching every game. I thought she was going to smash our windows last night.

 

[ripper868]

not a complaint, but a compliment. Klinsmann is rather enjoyable as a pundit, guy obviously has the knowledge, but he comes across as a guy I'd happily have 2-8 pints over a steak with as well.

 

[Lillian Thomson]

This is more of a Coleman Balls than a complaint.
Andres Townsend “He had all the time in the world and took too long over it. “

 

[hendrix]

I've heard it a few times. I've been listening to the Arab and french commentary because my wife has gone nuts for this WC. She's Moroccan and watching every game. I thought she was going to smash our windows last night.

Arab soccer commentary is next level.

It is either a homoerotic orgy tinged with incest and bestiality (good) or your father's anus is being cursed (not good).

There is no in between.

 

[Red_Ink_Squid]

Arab soccer commentary is next level.

It is either a homoerotic orgy tinged with incest and bestiality (good) or your father's anus is being cursed (not good).

There is no in between.

I'm sorry. But, err, what??