***Official*** New Zealand tour of Zimbabwe and South Africa 2016

[hendrix]

Either way:

1. It's true, weirdly unseasonal rain ruined the preparations at the ground. So change the venue

2. It's untrue, it's been a bit of extra rain but nothing out of the realms of prediction = facilities not up to scratch. So fix the facilities and/or change the venue.

It's really garbage to try and shift the blame from CSA and place it on unforeseeable circumstances. This is 100% on them.

 

[Zinzan]

What a ridiculous comment. If you get rain like that on top of earlier rain then it's going to effect any ground. And as has been noted, it's winter ffs.

Kiwi fans should be thanking their lucky stars for it.

Not sure if you just stumbled in unaware of the full context here, but you seem to have missed the point of the argument and criticism. It's not just about the rain ffs.

 

[Burgey]

Look, you saw the play at the start of NZ's innings, I gather. Search your heart, you know they've dodged a massive bullet here and would have been all out for 23. Now they have a shot at sneaking a series win in SA, which is no mean feat.

 

[Zinzan]

Lol, righto.

 

[hendrix]

Look, you saw the play at the start of NZ's innings, I gather. Search your heart, you know they've dodged a massive bullet here and would have been all out for 23. Now they have a shot at sneaking a series win in SA, which is no mean feat.

KW series average: infinity

 

[_Ed_]

KW series average: infinity

Same as Taylor's tour average.

 

[hendrix]

Same as Taylor's tour average.

Yup.

It's obvious who's getting out lucky here.

 

[Athlai]

New Zealand currently batting infinity tbf.

 

[Howsie]

CSA should cop a massive fine as far as I'm concerned, this was just downright atrocious. They relaid the entire ground in a month or two ago, why on earth would you schedule a match right after doing that. Even the commentators said as much on the first day when play was held up because of morning dew. Pommy said something along the lines of 'If it rains we'll lose a lot of time in this match' If a ****ing commentator can pick that up within the first five minutes of being there why couldn't a proper offical?

 

[Burgey]

"Unsatisfactory conditions" say the Kiwi fans as they buy their tickets for the upcoming summer matches at Eden Park with its 25 meter boundaries. #mcgsobig

 

[Magrat Garlick]

I'm also interested to hear the evidence that this was a massively unseasonal and unprecedented rainy August in Durban. It's been mentioned by Firdose who I reckon got it straight from CSA, and she's not one to actually check her facts...

So it would be nice to hear some actual meteorological opinions with some numbers.

I checked the global satellite-based forecast on Saturday night, as I was hoping for play, and it was supposed to have an absolute downpour. (I must admit I had expected better drainage, though.)

Ironically enough June through August are actually the driest months in Durban. So having the Test there later wouldn't have helped much.

 

[Zinzan]

"Unsatisfactory conditions" say the Kiwi fans as they buy their tickets for the upcoming summer matches at Eden Park with its 25 meter boundaries. #mcgsobig

Oh, you must mean that ground where Australia on their last two ODI outings there managed scores of 151 & 148 all out.... If only they could clear a 25 meter boundary more often eh?

 

[DriveClub]

Is there any team burgey doesn't troll?

 

[Zinzan]

Yes there is 1, can you guess?

Incidentally, in case folks are unaware, there is a secret weapon against Burgey's light-hearted trolling, one chink in his armour so to speak. Just make mention of Lillee's record in his 5 tests in the subcontinent and the West Indies and you'll see how prickly his soft underbelly becomes.

 

[hendrix]

"Unsatisfactory conditions" say the Kiwi fans as they buy their tickets for the upcoming summer matches at Eden Park with its 25 meter boundaries. #mcgsobig

 

[Burgey]

I see Zinzan is bringing over his patented powers of observation and analysis from the American Politics thread.

I'm an equal opportunity troller of cricket teams. Am always happy to sink the slipper into my own team as much as anyone else's. There's a tried and true formula which everyone ought to apply when analysing and commenting on cricket teams on CW and in general:

Australia - can't play the moving ball, whether it's seam up or spin/ attack player behaviour even when it's the same as that of your own players/ only subcontinental performances count/ suggest Warne a drug cheat/ put down every player who played between 1995-2009 as over rated and an arsehole because you have the ****s your own outfit couldn't hold a candle to them.
India - can't play when it bounces/ Tendulkar is a jerk/ lol fast bowlers/ lol fielding/ corruption/ all their fans have woeful sense of humour (this is actually true)/ they've never won here/ subcontinental records don't count
Pakistan - thinly veiled references to match fixing/ slag Imran/ they've never won here/ ball tampering using a bottle top/ subcontinental records don't count
NZ - cricketing small man's syndrome/ the national equivalent of taxi drivers and farmers - they're never happy no matter what (Volty excepted)/ say Williamson is a flash in the pan/ laugh at Boult and Southee's efforts in Aus last summer when their fans yapped them up.
England - climate/ overseas players/ soap dodgers/ ODIs/ slag off the targeted supporter's footy team
SL - everyone knows relying on spinners to carry the new ball attack is unmanly/ they've never won here/ subcontinental records don't count (caveat - don't bag Herath. Legend)/ implied suggestion Murali chucked.
SA - bit soft/ Kallis over rated/ Donald over rated/ De Villiers downhill skis/ grounds wash out too easily/ quotas.
WI - almost a bit too sad to slag off lately, tbh. But if you must, then terribad organisation/ players going after money over playing proper cricket/ haven't had a decent side since 1999/ say Viv is over rated.
Bangladesh - they're a club side in national colours/ can't play short stuff like the rest of the subcontinental players/ have no bowlers/ give Ireland a go instead/ they're useful for people who want to impress others with their knowledge of a lot of really, really irrelevant players on the world stage. Edit: subcontinental records don't count.
Zimbabwe - See WI less the players going off after the lucre, and the fact they've never had a decent side/ Flower was over rated (he was, ftr).

I think that's about it. Stick with that and you'll probably be ok.

 

[Burgey]

Didn't see him striking that pose in the final a few weeks later.

 

[Zinzan]

i see zinzan is bringing over his patented powers of observation and analysis from the "hillary clinton testimonial" thread.

.

fify

 

[Zinzan]

Australia - attack player behaviour even when it's the same as that of your own players

This one is especially hilarious; although it is satire after-all.

laugh at Boult and Southee's efforts in Aus last summer when their fan (KV) yapped them up.

FIFY

 

[vcs]

KW series average: infinity

Undefined, not infinity.

Sorry for the pedantry.