Best Sledging

[matts20891]

Hey, i play for my school and we play a few other schools in our general area
It's a pretty easy going comp and we all take it pretty lightly so we love it when it comes to a good sledge
I'm the wicket keeper and I always look forward to me and my slip to make a few general calls (and even receiving a few), not just towards the batsmen but towards our own team members... anything to throw the batsmen off concentration.
My team loves me for my comments.

I just wanted to know if anyone had some good quick one liners I could use in the upcoming games, or if you would like a few ideas i could put a few of my own down

thanks

IMPORTANT:
I would just like to take the time to say that I don't encourage sledging or think that it is always necessary on the cricket field. However, if you are a sledger it should only be done in moderation and should never go too far. I do it for laughs, not to target another player.

 

[Jakester1288]

Yeah, I would love some myself.

 

[matts20891]

well my all time favourite which we always use on this one guy in our team who just loves attention would have to be:
'if your parents seperated, would they still be brother and sister?'

 

[Nishan]

I have seen better leaves on a tree.

 

[AlanJLegend]

"I've seen better batters in a fish and chip shop"

"More leaves that a tree"

"More blocks than a Lego factory"

 

[matts20891]

keep them coming!!

haha nice

i still need more though!

how about a few of my own:

1. "bigger swinger than Austin Powers"
2. "Like a donut, all edges and no middle"
3. Ask your slip: "What do you call a deer with no eyes?"
Slip: "no idea?"
Me: "No, try an *opposition's name* batsmen"

 

[Smudge]

"Get the man a lifejacket, he's all at sea."

 

[Athlai]

"**** you're ****."

 

[matts20891]

"**** your ****."

What is that supposed to mean??

 

[Athlai]

What is that supposed to mean??

Pick and mix your favorite swears TBH.

 

[Redbacks]

swinging like a rusty gate

swinging like a dunny door on curry night

 

[JimmyGS]

Beaten like a red-headed step son.
Watching you is making me a worse batsman.
You couldn't score in a brothel.

 

[matts20891]

Beaten like a red-headed step son.
Watching you is making me a worse batsman.
You couldn't score in a brothel.

Hahahahahahaha

Thanks Jimmy thats the kind of stuff im looking for
I've never heard all three of those

Keep them coming!!!

 

[Jakester1288]

I gotta remember these for on the field. I always forget them.

 

[Something_Fishy]

"**** you're ****."

Hahaha! Legendary.I don't know any one-liners but for the best sledge in the history of the game read my avatar.

 

[Precambrian]

What is that supposed to mean??

It means **** your ****.

Alternatively cute your socks.

 

[Precambrian]

Hahaha! Legendary.I don't know any one-liners but for the best sledge in the history of the game read my avatar.

I suck at face-reading tbh.

 

[Precambrian]

Who all kissed ya in the last year except your mom?

 

[Ernest]

I personally never sledge I think it's for idiots that can't actually play but the best one I heard was in a final a few years back.. we were playing against some teenagers..

Captain comes out he's in his late 30's- a bit of grey in the hair.. first slip pipes up second ball..

"Hey do you think he's got grey hair in his ar*ehole?" General laughter all round..

Needless to say we smashed the little loud mouths.. taught them to concentrate on their cricket not on their sledging..

 

[andruid]

Beaten like a red-headed step son.
Watching you is making me a worse batsman.
You couldn't score in a brothel.

O beaten like an egg?