Just for Fun: Worst Test "Draft"

[chaminda_00]

Does someone want my spot. I just wanted to pick Muburak. I cbf doing to research to find crap players.

 

[Uppercut]

Robbie Hart

It's often said that the main importance of a wicket keeper is to ensure that the bowler knows for sure, when he hears the little nick, that the batsman is gone. Conversely, it's important for my team that the bowlers all know that in the unlikely event that the batsman edges one, the wicket keeper will bail them out. Robbie Hart fits the bill. To ensure that not only are there no nuggety lower-order partnerships involving the keeper, but also that plenty of potential wickets will go down, there can't be many better picks.

 

[HeathDavisSpeed]

Murray Chapple, NZ.

Chapple will likely be my captain. In his sole Test as captain chasing 197 to win, Chapple and his inspired team mates were all out for 48 runs. He never played again.

His personal career highlight would have been his 25 minute duck against England opening the batting.

With a batting average of 19.11, he's also a handy Left arm medium bowler averaging 84 with the ball.

Robbie Hart

It's often said that the main importance of a wicket keeper is to ensure that the bowler knows for sure, when he hears the little nick, that the batsman is gone. Conversely, it's important for my team that the bowlers all know that in the unlikely event that the batsman edges one, the wicket keeper will bail them out. Robbie Hart fits the bill. To ensure that not only are there no nuggety lower-order partnerships involving the keeper, but also that plenty of potential wickets will go down, there can't be many better picks.

Two top quality picks there. I can imagine Murray desperately turning to his bowling when the going gets really tough - and things getting even worse. But the unsteady hand of an appalling keeper shouldn't be underestimated.

1.1 	Zinzan12		Blair Hartland
1.2 	Somerset		Asoka de Silva
1.3 	Michael777777		Grant Bradburn
1.4 	Goughy			Ian Salisbury
1.5 	Heef			Michael Papps
1.6 	Samuel Vimes		Don Kenyon
1.7 	Chaminda_00		Jehan Mubarak
1.8 	NUFAN			Murray Chapple
1.9 	Steulen			Mohammad Sami
1.10 	Uppercut		Chris Cowdrey

2.10	Uppercut		Robbie Hart
2.9	Steulen
2.8	NUFAN
2.7	Chaminda_00
2.6	Samuel Vimes
2.5	Heef
2.4	Goughy
2.3	Michael777777
2.2	Somerset
2.1	Zinzan12

I guess Chaminda_00 can be replaced by Matt79. Could you Public Message him to let him know?

 

[NUFAN]

Hey Heef, Can I email you my next pick?

I'll be on for the next half hour or so, but after that it'll probably be about 15 hours before I'm next on, no point holding this up.

 

[Steulen]

Well then, for my second pick I have my eyes firmly on the allrounder spot. And it goes to:

Kirtivardhan Azad

Although a cog in the World Cup-winning Indian clockwork, his Test exploits demand inclusion:

135 runs @ 11.25
3 wickets @ 124.33

Now here's to hoping the treasure trove of inept NZ opening batsmen isn't depleted by the time I get my 3rd draftee.

 

[NUFAN]

Cancel that HDS,

My next pick is Bill Payle, again from NZ.

He averaged just 10.06 in 8 Test matches, scoring 11 single figure scores in his 15 innings.

His first class average of 21 indicates that he really deserves his place in this side.

 

[HeathDavisSpeed]

Haha Heef, didn't you defend Papps's place in the team during the SA series?

Not sure. I think I may have said that it'd be interesting to see how he goes against a team other than South Africa.

Now here's to hoping the treasure trove of inept NZ opening batsmen isn't depleted by the time I get my 3rd draftee.

Its a seam that will never run dry. As long as New Zealand are playing test cricket, abysmal test opening batsmen will roll off the production line.

His first class average of 21 indicates that he really deserves his place in this side.

Excellent. A proven failure at first class level as well. Sounds like you've unearthed a real gem there.

Matt79 is up now.

 

[Somerset]

Does Matt know its his turn in this draft?

 

[Magrat Garlick]

Meh, the 12 hours are up anyway.

Sameer Dighe, because it's hard to get people to admit wicketkeepers are awful. Called up at 31 and averaged 15.

 

[Goughy]

Whats the order?

 

[Magrat Garlick]

Whats the order?

Heath, you, Michael, Somerset, Zinzan. With Matt jumping in when he realises.

 

[HeathDavisSpeed]

I'm going for a keeper too.

What I'm looking for is the perfect antithesis to someone like Adam Gilchrist - the typical wicketkeeper-batsman.

I'm looking for a vaguely creditable wicketkeeper with atrocious batting abilities.

I've gone the West Indies' David Williams, described by cricinfo as a "competent wicketkeeper". His batting average of 13.44 will help to ensure that late middle order collapses become a staple expectation of my team.

1.1 	Zinzan12		Blair Hartland
1.2 	Somerset		Asoka de Silva
1.3 	Michael777777		Grant Bradburn
1.4 	Goughy			Ian Salisbury
1.5 	Heef			Michael Papps
1.6 	Samuel Vimes		Don Kenyon
1.7 	Matt79			Jehan Mubarak
1.8 	NUFAN			Murray Chapple
1.9 	Steulen			Mohammad Sami
1.10 	Uppercut		Chris Cowdrey

2.10	Uppercut		Robbie Hart
2.9	Steulen			Kirtivardhan Azad
2.8	NUFAN			Bill Payle
2.7	Matt79
2.6	Samuel Vimes		Sameer Dighe
2.5	Heef			David Williams
2.4	Goughy
2.3	Michael777777
2.2	Somerset
2.1	Zinzan12

 

[Goughy]

With the aim to make my bowing attack as threatening as jelly, my focus is on that deep well of ordinary called the English spinner.

I choose Richard Dawson.

A pretty decent cricketer, but I have no idea how he played Test cricket.

A Test bowling average of 60+, a FC average of 40+ and being shown the door by 2 Counties well before the age of 30 makes him a great candidate for this team.

 

[Michaelf7777777]

Brendon Bracewell for my next pick pleae - Batting average of 2.40 and bowling average of 41.78 suggest mediocre also shares genes with one of the worst coaches in New Zealand history

 

[Flem274*]

Brendon Bracewell for my next pick pleae - Batting average of 2.40 and bowling average of 41.78 suggest mediocre also shares genes with one of the worst coaches in New Zealand history

My neighbour will be happy. Hates the bloke.

 

[Somerset]

Just to make the announcement of my team difficult I'll select 1950s Indian batsman (or perhaps batting allrounder given he took 114 FC wickets) Jayasinghrao Ghorpade. 8 tests, 229 runs at an average of 15.26, and 0/131 from 25 overs in the five innings be bowled in.

 

[HeathDavisSpeed]

Zinzan12 has missed his go.

Somerset is back up and Matt79 can also pick whenever he's available.

 

[Somerset]

New Zealander David O'Sullivan. 11 tests, 158 runs @ 9.3 and 18 wickets @ 68. His slow left arm bowling, in tandem with Asoka, should be brilliant in gifting the opposition runs.

 

[HeathDavisSpeed]

Michael7s, Zinzan12 and Matt79 all up. C'mon guys. Let's get into this!

 

[Michaelf7777777]

Jack Crapp for my next pick his name should be good for publicity