That really is one of the most touching posts that I have ever read. As I am about to begin my thirty years' wasted life, some experimental head-to-hammer contact would probably do me good. Care to relay your psychological lessons?
Okay.
About five years ago, my brother (he is 11 years younger) came to meet me at my factory at Daman. I was spending most of my waking hours at 'work' when at the factory so he spent time with me by sitting across the table in my large cabin or at the visitors sofa kept at the far end of the room. At the end of the second day, he told me he was very worried about me.
On my asking why he told me I was not 'living' right and doing great injustice to myself (remember he did not even mention my family).
I told him that being a psychiatrist, he was just seeing a problem where none existed and that I loved nothing more than my work. He disagreed and asked me to get up and come with me. We went back to the company guest house where I used to stay when visiting the works.
He gave me a piece of paper and asked me to reply in writing to whatever he said.
Then he gave me a hypothetical situation in which he informed me that I was suffering from a terminal disease which was completely incurable. That I would die in exactly six months from that day. The good news being that during these six months I would enjoy perfect health and be able to lead a normal active life.
Then he asked, that given this hypothetical scenario, what would I do immediately, tomorrow, next week and for the rest of the six months till my death. He asked me to think about it if I wanted and let me know the next day. But I was very clear about it ans said I could tell him right away.
He asked me to write it down and this is what I wrote.
1. I would immediately inform my Board of Directors of my immediate resignation from the position of the Managing Director of the Company and ask them to make arrangements to relieve me within the week.
2. I would use that week to settle all my financial affairs, make my will, inform my close family of my decisions
3. I would, at the end of the week, move to the mountains (a valley really) and live there for the rest of my days.
4. I would play cricket every single day of whats left of my life.
5. I would read all the books I have been wanting to read and haven't been able to.
There was some other small stuff but this was the most relevant.
My brother took the paper and said."Ok. So clearly, cricket, being close to the mountains and reading are the three greatest joys that you think life has to offer. Interesting. Tell me, when was the last time you took a 2-3 weeks holiday and went off to the mountains"
"About fifteen years ago", I said.
"I see, and when did you last play cricket (except in the backyard with small kids)."
"Twenty years ago.", I replied getting an idea of what was coming.
"And when was the last time you read a book, not a thin paper back but a big fat book from cover to cover, in a few days or a reasonable time so as to maintain your interest and do justice to your reading"
"About ten years ago" I said sheepishly.
"I am amazed," he said, " You seem to be saying, from what you have written on this paper that these things are so precious to you that when so little is left of your life, you will spend bulk of your time in these activities and yet in twenty years, in the prime of your life, you seem to have ignored them altogether. How come ? I don't get it"
"Why, I just dont have the time" I protested, " My work in running my company just doesn't allow me any time"
"But from the first point on this paper, I can see that this 'work' of yours is the least important thing in your life. Its the first thing you want to give up when time is running out and is to be rationed. Then how come you have been avoiding, for more than half of your adult life, that which clearly is the closest to your heart and squandering away your time doing that which clearly is the least .
"Do you think that you are going to be so lucky that someone will come and warn you six months before you are stricken or die, so that you can get at least half a year of joy from living. No my dear, you will just go. Just like that...without any warning...with all these unfulfilled desires, these trips to the mountains, the pleasure of those cover drives even if in the nets and the reading of the lovely books that fill the library in your house will not be the pleasures that you will live to enjoy.
"Chances are you will be too old to play cricket, too old to climb those mountain sides and take those long walks in the woods and who knows even your eyesight may fail you."
"What do you think you are doing. If someone took it upon him to make you unhappy, he could not do a better job than you are doing yourself, have been doing it for such a large part of your life and, whats worse, you dont even realise it"
It hit me on the head like a hammer.
I decided there and then to take early retirement and while it took me a couple of years to do it, I did inform my Board of Directors within a week that I wanted to leave and the decision was irreversible. Rest was just a matter of negotiations, grooming my successor, settling my financial affairs including selling my stakes in the company which was very substantial amount of money and my inheritance for my children. I still did it at an age when I could have gone on for at leat another ten years, maybe longer.
Thats it, my dear.